A Look Back

In 2006 I was blessed with my first baby. How happy I was with having a new baby but I was having a hard time getting past how my birth experience had gone down a totally different path than what I hoped and planned for. I never thought I would ever have a homebirth but after some events that changed my mind I had decided to go in the direction of having just that.

I was going to have a natural childbirth and hopefully a water birth too. I had taken the Bradley childbirth class and felt more prepared to have my baby naturally. I was nervous just like any first time mom is, but of course couldn't wait to meet my precious baby.

So the due date came and went. Then days, weeks passed by. Finally almost three weeks past the due date I went into labor. It was strong, hard, exhausting labor that was just not progressing. After 20 hours and only at a 7 dilation we made the decision to go to the hospital. I couldn't believe I was going to the hospital but I was so exhausted I decided to have an epidural in hopes to be able to rest and renew my strength. I was also given pitocin to hopefully make some progress. Those decision did not help. After another 10 hours and some drops in the babies heart rate I was informed I needed to have an emergency c-section. I remember being in shock, and crying uncontrollably and wondering how this had gone down such a completely different path than what I desired. That was hard to accept and come to terms with. So many different emotions, thoughts, and fears enveloped me as I was wheeled in for that emergency c-section. Then joy and an abundance of love thankfully overshadowed those earlier emotions as my beautiful baby came into this world!